There was a lamp, but she refused to turn it on. She kept saying ‘I’ve lost it; I can’t find it’.“I asked her, ‘What are you looking for, Auntie?’ She answered that she was looking for lilac water for her hair. Then she reached out her hand and grabbed mine to pull me into the room to help her find it. But I tore myself away. I wouldn’t go in; I was so afraid.”She stopped speaking, but kept on breathing hard, searching for breath and who knows what else.“Maybe you miss your aunt more than you realize,” Cal said.“It was like she was coming back again to try to pull me into that dark room,” Roxie said. “I knew I shouldn’t be there, but something inside me was pulling me to that place. It took all I had to break away.”Cal watched her breathing slow as she slumped down in her seat. The wide eyes had half closed. She lifted her hands and buried her face in them. She began speaking. Her hands muffled the tone, but Cal listened to the words.“I can’t stand being afraid, Cal. I don’t even. But now they were really aching. I started to rinse the soap from his hair and accidentally brushed one of my throbbing nipples across his face. OMG, I was totally embarrassed. What was I doing? I brought him forward and started toweling the excess water from his hair.He noticed the redness and said, “ you look lovely when you blush.” I thought I was going to die right there. This man made me so nervous. How was I going to continue if I couldn’t stay focused? “Thank you” I replied, totally mortified. “How would you like your cut?” I went on, trying to cover my nervousness.He again looked deep in to my eyes and said, “off the collar and thinned on top.”I start combing and began cutting. My hands were steady but I was shaking inside. I’m not sure if it was the fact that I hadn’t had sex in a few months or the fact that I felt he somehow knew my inner secrets. This man had some kind of power over me. How I knew that or why I felt this way was a mystery to me, but yet I knew he did.He.
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